Wedding Clashers

Greetings...

This past Sunday, I had the opportunity to attend my first (last?) Korean wedding. My principal's son was tying the knot and an open (mandatory?) invitation was made to myself and the other teachers at the infamous Dong Myeong Elementary School. I say "mandatory" because I got the feeling from Mrs. Lee and Lucy (above) that attending was more a show of respect than anything. I didn't feel the slightest bit forced into going by some administrative propriety because 1) I love weddings and 2) I was darn curious to see how Koreans get down with their bad-selves.

I got dressed up in my one and only suit and met Mrs. Lee down at the wedding hall (Lucy arrived a bit later). This wedding hall is a building directly across the street from Busan's City Hall (one subway stop away from my place). While church weddings do exist in Korea, apparently most weddings take place at these wedding halls. It took place on the third floor of a 20+ floor building and it was not the only wedding happening at the same time. In fact, this place hosts a plethora of weddings in a day, in 30 minute ceremonies from 11am or so 'til 4 or 5pm. So, this means that the decorations, seating and facilities are setup generically--this does, of course, take away the "individuality" of weddings but I'm sure it's a heck of a lot cheaper. It's a long ways away from a "Vegas wedding" but I'm sure many American women would disapprove of this for themselves.

PAY THE PIPER!

It's customary to give money to the bride and groom--since there was no reception (a.k.a. no Dollar Dance), people simply slip some cash into an envelope and drop it off upon arrival. I gave 30,000 won (a little over $20) and I know for a fact that that's on the cheap end of things. Lucy told me that since these ceremonies are so short and plentiful, many people can't stay for the lunch afterwards so, in that case, you get your own envelope with 10,000 won in it. I was under the impression that we'd be staying for the lunch but I got handed my "No Lunch Refund" without being asked.

We all waited in a lobby area adjacent to the ceremony room. The groom and his parents (my principal and his wife) stood near the entrance greeting people as they came in. My principal is usually somewhat of a wet blanket but he was absolutely beaming on this fine Sunday. You could tell he was tickled to see me there (he publicly thanked me for coming on Monday at lunch). I didn't get pictures of them but they also had these elaborate floral arrangement/easels with ribbons and writing on them--I had seen these before on the street one day in front of a store and I thought someone had died on the sidewalk or something but Mrs. Lee told me that they were a congrats/good luck for opening up a new store.

Video #1: Here Comes The Blide.

We finally got things rolling and when we stepped around the corner into the actual ceremony room, it was jam packed. There must've been at least 200 people there and seating for maybe half of those. We stood in the back and I was able to scramble for my camera as the bride made her way down. You'll notice that you can hear everyone gabbing and gawking during the ceremony which is one of things that I couldn't understand. They hired a small string section to play the famous song but you could barely here it. You'd think in a culture where you have to bow 34,287 times a day that they'd show even more respect in a situation like this but you'd be wrong. Notice the bubbles: this was a surprising and cheerful touch. You'll also notice the groom shaking his soon-to-be father in law's hand while putting his free hand under his business arm. This is a custom the occurs many times during the day: when someone pours you a drink, hands you change, shakes your hand, etc. It goes back to the olden times when people wore big sleeves and they wanted to keep them away from the food or the fire or what have you. Sometimes I remember to do this and sometimes I don't.

(I intentionally misspelled "Blide" and "Clashers" not to be culturally insensitive--Koreans will fully acknowledge their inability to distinguish between "L" and "R" and it's just too darn funny anyways.)

Video #2: Singin' Fool.

Immediately after the official ceremony ended, this guy got up and sang a song in tribute. This is yet another example of just how much these Koreans love to sing.

Video #3: Eat Your Heart Out, Spinal Tap!

The bubbles are a nice touch--it definitely adds that oft-desired "fairytale" factor to the proceedings. But when I saw artificial fog coming out, I knew that this wedding was not messing around. If you've seen the film This Is Spinal Tap, then you might remember a certain iconic scene when their attempt to be "Grand and Theatrical" by using a life-size recreation of Stonehenge ended with a minuscule model being danced around by midgets (see for yourself here and sorry about the tiny little "F-bomb" in there) After seeing this, I have decided that a fog machine is a must for my wedding. Check it out!

Video #4: Swords and Push-ups.

They cut the cake with either a small sword or the largest cake knife ever. I was hoping for the bride and groom to take turns throwing ninja stars at the cake until everyone had a piece but I'll settle for a sword. Then you'll see the groom get down on his hands and knees and do some push-ups with his new bride riding side-saddle. Again, after the bubbles, fog machine and excessive crowd noise, I shouldn't have been surprised by this little display but I was. I inquired about this later and, while it's mostly just a funny thing to do, it's also meant as an example of how "strong" he'll be as a husband.

I've since decided that at my wedding, my "feat of strength" will be to have a knife-fight to the death with my (late) father-in-law.

Video #5: Take A Bow.

You'll get to see my principal as the parents bow with their newly-fused kids. He's on the far right.

Video #6: Man And Wife.

So, they finally walk back down the aisle. The one other thing to point out here is a little pop followed by some "oohs and aahs" at the 22 second mark. On the video it just sounds like someone popping their gum really loud but it was in fact a "party popper" thing and it was kinda loud and right next to me. If you know me at all, you know that I was probably the only one in the room who jumped at this like a beaten down dog. Perfect.

And that was that. The group of Dong Myeong teachers that were there went out to our own lunch down the street. This was of course another "sit down" meal but I'm proud to report that I'm getting a little used to living in the dark ages before they invented the chair. I still have to shift my legs back and forth to avoid a complete loss of circulation but it's no where near that excruciating first lunch on our way down to Busan some 2 months ago.

I hope you enjoyed this little window into another fascinating facet of Korean culture because I did.

Coming soon...Seoul this weekend!

Stay tuned...

-Brent